Craigslist: Keepin’ It Creepy

Very. Very. Creepy.

i thought
Date: 2010-06-03, 6:27AM EDT

i loved u but realy found out i didnt like you but i am willing to get along if u are whos the adult here i dont need any more headcases messing with me i am the smartest person i know not saying thoes who surround me are stupid but realy when i get my man hood back no one will run over me again!!!

Greers laundry . Black ford f 150 – m4w (Dorset st)
Date: 2010-05-30, 10:56PM EDT

Short cute brown hair red sweatshirt jean shorts greenish shirt under sweatshirt and tiny and driving a black ford f150 extended cab with carseat with pink around the outside of it. Here’s lookin to talk to u” I was outside when u were smoking a cigerette ‘ what was I wearing or driving so I know it’s u. I’ll be waiting

walking your feline at the C Jam! Wow – m4w – 36 (Burlington)
Date: 2010-04-24, 6:22PM EDT

WOW! I saw you in the parking lot of the “Clam Jam” bar and grill…From the moment I saw you strutting around the clam jam with your beautiful cat in leash I was taken off my feet. Oh lady from N.J. with two husbands that walks her cat on a leash…I saw the pain from the tears from “Boots” getting his little outfit in a ruckus…Oh lady it made little “streaks” thru the mascara you dawned that evening…oh the white spandex and poufy fur collared coat…but you looked so good too (I was talking about your cat) but…if your the one…if you use the word “feclemfpt’ed” when “booties” got his mane wet then your her! If your reading this…know this. I can take care of you and Boots better than your other husbands…I may not be just like TJ Ramrod or Biff Gristle,(not to name names, uggghmm) nor do I have the money to bath in Drakaar (yet)…but my flat is your flat…and some day…with a little faith (and some sort of scheme) I too can become as bottomless and empty as you…someday we can strut around…The clam jam our palace, boots in hand, together…as one we walk with no feclemfpting just you, me & boots…!

Ps:You were waiting on your husbands to pay the bill so you went to take your cat for a walk on his leash! You were traveling in a Lexus or a Prius or one of those “us’s” cars…with NJ plates…BTW, if you are reading this and you think this is you…please respond…lol…seriously! Oh lady of the white spandex driving with Biff Gristle and T.J. Ramrod in one of those “us’es” cars with N.J. plates that wears cloths that accentuate your unparalleled quest for money! Write me…


Matt G. Paradise is Executive Director of Purging Talon, a media company responsible for releasing groundbreaking and often imitated audio, video, print, and Web work since 1993, including the internationally respected Satanic magazine, Not Like Most. Paradise is also a Magister in the Church of Satan and, since the early-1990s, has also done media representative work for the CoS through all major media forms — network television, radio, print publications, and the Internet. He is the author of Bearing The Devil’s Mark, a collection of writings on Satanism; as well as editor of The Book of Satanic Quotations (First and Second Editions). He was also producer and co-host of Terror Transmission, a horror movie commentary podcast; and is currently the producer and host of three podcasts (The Accusation Party, Vintage Vinyl Vivisection and Strange Moments in Cultural History) on The Accusation Network.

You may also like...