Craigslist: To Camel Toe Or Not To Camel Toe

April 3, 2010 MGP 5

I love my sweet, lovely, knee-jerk, over-reactive, begging-for-attention little city of Burlington. It’s like a screaming toddler who imagines it’s had its pacifier yanked out of its adorable mouth over and over and over and over and… “Camel Toe” on Pearl St. (Parking lot of Spectrum) Date: 2010-03-09, 1:57PM EST To the dude that thought it would be funny, helpful, or just mean to let me know how my crotch […]

The New Sofa Dilemma

March 30, 2010 MGP 5

That $3,500 beauty above is not it. Don’t be dumb. But, for regular visitors to my abode, I am getting a new one. Newer, better, softer, same size, and it’s a sleeper sofa, too. Would order it tomorrow, but I’m currently plotting on the best way to cat-proof my $1,100 investment. Choices are faux-leather or upholstery. And, yes, I’ve measured the space. It’s been weeks now. Still thinking. Thinking. Thinking. […]

3/25/10 – Essex, VT – 1:25 pm

March 26, 2010 MGP 2

So, about once a week, my co-worker and I go out to Essex and grab some lunch at a sub shop there. And each time we pull out of the parking lot, we notice this lone sign. It looks to be a relic, whether or not it is (and I’m not really sure), but perhaps long ago, there was a realtor named Joan — except that she sold a lot […]

Excuse Me, Miss… My Office Copier Speaks Jive

March 11, 2010 MGP 4

And then my whole office got into it… Copier: Shiiiiit, maaaaan. That honky muf’ be messin’ mah old lady… got to be runnin’ cold upside down his head, you know? Telephone: Hey home’, I can dig it. Know ain’t gonna lay no mo’ big rap up on you, man! Copier: I say hey, sky… subba say I wan’ see… Stapler: Uh-huh. Copier: …pray to J I did the same ol’ […]

Craigslist: All Is Lost In Vermont

February 20, 2010 MGP 0

Some people just don’t know when to hop off the heartbreak train. And it’s this sad and masochistic insistence that drags these poor souls down a path of desperate grasping to belief, faith, promises, vows, what could have been, what was had, etc, ad infinitum. For the truly clueless, It’s as if they set their own house on fire, remain inside, and then complain about the heat. I couldn’t possibly […]

So, MGP! What’s Shakin’?

February 7, 2010 MGP 3

After a year and a half of being away from video production, I’ve decided to take up the reins once again. Part of my hiatus came with the changing out of one machine for another — namely, my old G4 mirrored-door for my Intel Mac. Seemed the version of Final Cut Pro I had didn’t want to play with an Intel processor or the too-futuristic video card inside. So, through […]

1/15/10 – Burlington, VT – 6:31 pm

January 16, 2010 MGP 3

So, I’m just trying to wrap my head around this one… I’m buying kitchen stuff downtown today as per my Bachelor Pad directives, and I stumbled upon this displayed product. I see that these are pieces that constitute the semblance of a dog and that they are to be attached to a tree. That, I understand. But, it’s the why that kept me frozen in terror for the moments I […]

Craigslist: Poor, Poor, Alisha

December 30, 2009 MGP 2

Though hardly a secret, Vermont Craigslist’s “missed connections” section is packed to capacity with some truly stalker types. I mean, the stuff by which ’70s CBS Late Movies and Giallo films are made of. But, with the new era comes the new breed of creep — and the lingo hasn’t exactly improved with time, either. As a portrait of misspent youth and mischanneled sexual tensions, we present this linguistically challenged […]

How’s It Hangin’, MGP?

December 5, 2009 MGP 0

Currently I’m caught in a double storm of finals for school and busiest time of the year at work, so if I owe some of you an e-mail or whatever, that’s the reason. Yes, my e-mailbox is packed to the hilt with inquiries and I will get to them as soon as possible, which might mean next week or so. Thanks for your patience. So, the new onslaught of added […]

Halloween: A Nightmare In Pictures

November 3, 2009 MGP 0

As an excuse to both promote the podcast and have a lot of fun, I and the other half of Terror Transmission had a shindig in the area. Usually, I’m a bit wary of staying in town for Halloween because it’s invariably lame and makes me wish I was somewhere else… like going to one of the places I’ve usually visited (out of state) for the observance. This time was, […]

Happy Halloween! Happy 16th, Purging Talon!

October 31, 2009 MGP 3

“Halloween is the night / The legend says the ghost will rise On Halloween they can’t redeem / A restless soul from an ancient scene At the sound of the demon bell / Everything will burn to Hell Rise… rise… rise… It’s Halloween Rise… rise… The ghost will rise” – Mercyful Fate Yes, today marks the sixteenth year of Purging Talon‘s existence. Sweet sixteen, and been kissed by EVERYONE! Well, […]